Tuesday, December 9, 2008

BATTLEROAR - To Death and Beyond CD review

BATTLEROAR - To Death and Beyond CD
Cruz Del Sur Records

So no shit there you are stranded in your home after a snow storm has blanketed the countryside. It's you and a couple of buddies. You are bored and have nothing to do. I repeat you and your "MALE" buddies have "NOTHING" to do. The cable is out so no TV or Internet but at least you still have power and a refrigerator full of beer. Also one of your buddies, the guy you'll probably eat first if worse comes to worse, has a small stack of Epic Power Metal CDs to play. Think about it, men, beer, stranded, Power Metal? Ah yeah right, the only thing missing is the Hercules Unchained DVD.

So you look through your buddy's stack of CDs in order to fill in the boredom. The first CD is that DRAGON band which you were bored with before they got big. Next up it's MANOWAR, to fight to kill forever more! Ok you can put your arms down. The video of their Euro Tour was cool the first time you saw it and the same can be said about the music. Next up it's MANILLA ROAD, yeah that band which music critics like to name drop in order to show off their snobbery. We'll leave that one for people with no lives except for the ones they have on Forum sites. Finally you find this one, To Death and Beyond. So into the stereo it goes and what comes out is?

Holy diver, this guy sounds like Ronnie James Dio back in the day fronting SAXON. Fuckin A this is cool. Makes me wish I was a teenager again with long hair and a denim jacket with IRON MAIDEN's Killers album cover painted on the back. And lets not forget the pack of Camel Filters in the jacket pocket and a bag of "you know what" in your pants pocket. Hell yeah and these guys are from Greece! I wonder if this is available on 8-Track? I wonder if anyone I know still has an 8-Track Tape Deck. And if they did it would obviously be in their basement. Along with all those black-lite posters they bought from Spencer's Gifts in that brand new thing they're calling a "mall". Yeah like those things will be popular, I doubt it.

Should I get serious now? This is BATTLEROAR's third full length but their first for this Italian label. For modern day Metalheads their sound is described as Power Metal. Old fucks like me just called it Metal back in those days of yore. Back then you only had two types of music. There was the stuff you and your friends liked and then there was crap. I'm sure you've heard stories from your parents. And no it was not just one big Heavy Metal parking lot. But seriously folks I can't believe how "perfect" this dink sounds as far as originality. Epic vocals, acoustic guitars and violins, power drumming and power chords. And look at that fuckin cover? It's cool as fuck! Listening to this has even effected my writing because I sound like a 17 year old. Cool!


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